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Babies, Children, Family, Parenting, Parenting Advice

What is Colic?

What is colic? Well besides for being a nonsensical, immensely frustrating condition that tiny babies suffer from and something sent to test a parents every reserve. Colic is up there with myths and legends and things like UFO’s and Big-foot  and nobody really knows why it happens to seemingly happy babies and although people tell you about it, you can only truly understand it, if happens to you.

Unfortunately doctors don’t know what causes colic, what the disorder is, or how to cure it. It is also uncertain whether colicky babies are in pain but what they do know, is that colic does not indicate the presence of a serious medical problem. It is maintained that a certain amount of crying is normal and healthy for a baby.

Infantile colic is most common in the first few weeks, to four months of a baby’s life; rarely does it endure past six months of age. Paediatricians often use the “Rule of Three” to diagnose colic: “A baby that cries for three or more hours per day, at least three times per week, within a three-month period”. {Wess, et al., “Paroxysmas fussing in infancy.” Pediatrics 1984:74:998.} About 25 percent of babies worldwide meet the official “Rule of Threes” criteria for medical diagnosis of colic.

What are the signs of colic:

Some of the more common signs are – Constant crying, tongue-trusting, irritability, abdominal bloating, frequent yawning, back and neck arching, spitting-up, blueness around the mouth, mottled skin.

Realistically you may spend every waking hour, either in your paediatricians office or on the internet searching for answers, as to what colic is or how to cure it but may never get the satisfactory answers or results you actually want or need. As my paed told me many years ago – “you will have tried every medical potion and in the end your baby will have naturally grown out of that phase of its life”.

What are the potential causes or triggers of colic in a newborn:

  • Newborns have an immature digestive system that has never processed food. The gastrointestinal system is literally just learning to function. Muscles that support digestion have not developed the proper rhythm for moving food efficiently thought the digestive tract. Additionally, newborns lack the benevolent bacterial flora (probiotics) that develop over time to aid digestion. This explains why almost all infants outgrow colic within the first six months.
  • It is also thought that certain foods eaten by mothers while breastfeeding contain volatile chemicals and allergens that in a small percentage of infants result in colic discomfort and upset a babies digestive system. It is possible that while breastfeeding certain trace elements of cruciferous vegetables and other gas-producing foods may be passed via breast milk to baby and cause gas and bloating.
  • Other factors that can cause colic are: hunger, overfeeding, swallowed air, the ingredients and the reconstitution of formulae could also be an issue.

There are many different trains of though as to what the best cure or remedies are to alleviate colic, so I thought I would share a few of these with you:

  • Mix a small amount of Rooibos (South African tea) with breast or formula milk for the colicky baby.
  • Drink one cup of chamomile tea a day as long as you are breastfeeding your baby. CAUTION: Do not give chamomile to a baby because it can cause an allergic reaction.
  • Other tea remedies for breastfeeding moms to drink,  to alleviate colic symptoms are fennel seed tea and peppermint tea, which help to calm and sooth immature digestive systems and provide some relief from gas and bloating.
  • Products such as Colic Calm Gripe Water, Bennetts Colic Remedy, Colief Infant Drops. {there are many more but these are the ones I know of}
  • Homeopathic remedies such as Mag Phos and Chamomilla/Millefolium drops may help reduce the spasms and cramps.
  • Limiting the amount of stimulation that your baby is exposed to can also reduce the symptoms of colic.
  • Baby massage is also a great way to alleviate colic and reduce pain caused by bloating and it also soothing for your baby and massage can also help them sleep more peacefully. {This was a remedy that I found really worked for me – the pic above is off my youngest enjoying a baby massage!}
  • Chiropractic manipulation is also thought to help relieve colic, this is not something that I ever tried but many moms use this with great results.
  • Changes made to a mothers diet while breastfeeding can also reduce colic symptoms in a baby.
  • The last resort and a sometimes necessary option is medication, which you can obtain with prescription from your doctor or over-the-counter from your pharmacist.
Most importantly is that you seek professional help if the natural remedies do not work for your baby and remember to try one remedy at a time, to establish exactly what works and what does not. Also remember to look after yourself, a frazzled mom or dad is no good to anyone. Have a good support system and seek the help and advice of care givers such as midwives, clinic sisters or other moms that have been through this before – even if it is just to have someone to talk to.

I would love to hear from you – if you have any other colic remedies or would like to share your experience with us, please leave a comment below this post.

Source: Colic Calm, Baby Sense

Images are all property of ©Super Mom Blog please do not copy them or use them without written consent.

Children, Family, Parenting, Parenting Advice

Parenting With Purpose

 

Are you parenting with purpose?

Before I get into more detail let’s look at my parenting journey. I was a fairly young parent starting out, something that I am truly grateful for, but I do realise most have very little control over this. Having a baby, like most other things, came easy to me; no great fuss, we decided we wanted a baby and it pretty much happened instantly. Great you may think but sometimes you get more than you bargain for! I have never been the most patient person and I guess I am rather selfish by nature, so my introduction into parenthood was anything but smooth. In actual fact I fought it all the way but being young it meant that life could still kick the stubbornness out of me. I was gifted with a perfect baby girl who made it her life mission to challenge all the parts of me that needed it.

The early weeks of being a new parent were probably the most difficult adjustment I have had to make in my life. You are thrown into an unknown world with little or no preparation for what you are doing. Normal daily functions become a luxury (even eating a meal is a challenge) and sleep you can forget about completely! It is amazing what sleep deprivation can do to a person. My early days of being a mom are somewhat of a blur. Certain things I think I have chosen to block from my memory but what I can say for sure is that I have grown immensely as a parent and a person since those early days.

We have moved on somewhat since those early days, two children later and hopefully a fair amount wiser! I do feel that it is valuable to take stock and assess how far I have come as a parent and for that matter as a person! So what kind of parent am I? Well I am neither a helicopter parent, who watches their child’s every move, nor am I the standby and watch-it-happen-type. I feel that I am somewhere in the middle. My decision quite a while ago was never to push my children into things they did not want to do. Do not get me wrong, I care very much whether my children succeed or fail but they need to choose what they fail or succeed at. I once made the fatal error of encouraging (ok pushing!) my eldest to take dance lessons, until one day I enquired whether she was enjoying it. Her little face turned to mine with a rather anxious expression “no mom” – when I asked why she was doing dancing if she was not enjoying it, her very innocent but alarming response was “I am doing it for you”!!!

This event was all the wakeup call I needed; my decision from that day forward was to never push my children but rather to encourage them. I see it every day, parents pushing and driving their children to the brink of near exhaustion, trying to be the best at everything. You really have to ask yourself whether it is all worth it? Will it make them better people in the long run? Probably not; very successful possibly, but well-rounded I don’t think so!

So what am I getting at? Well when I started out as a parent I had no idea where I wanted my parenting journey to lead to, but along the way I have come to realise that my duty as a parent is to be an advisor rather than a dictator, which does not come easy to me because I like to be in control. It may not be perfect but I want to let my children experience life for themselves, not some version that I have orchestrated for them.

Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself. ~ Deborah Reber, Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul

Teaching our children to be independent and stand on their own two feet will better equip them for life once they have to face the big wide world on their own. As parents we need to be on hand and ready to pick up the pieces if necessary but it is by living life that lessons are learned.

Parenting with purpose is something I am very passionate about and while I may not be a professional or do not have all the answers, I do feel that I have knowledge to impart and want to share my insights with you in the hope that it will be of some help in your parenting journey!

I would love hear from you – what has been the hardest part of your parenting journey and what has it taught you?

Too read more of my parenting insights click here

 

 

Children, Family, Fathers, Mothers, Parenting, Parenting Advice

Guilt Free Parenting

 

Much to my surprise the word “guilt” seems to be largely associated with the act of parenting; I have come across a few articles recently about this very association. Strangely enough they actually should have nothing in common but still we keep hearing about how guilty parents feel about : “ not spending enough quality time with their children”, “not participating in school events or functions”, “not giving equal attention to each child”… and so the list goes on.

Firstly let us look at the dictionary definition of the word “guilt” – “an awareness of having done wrong or committed a crime, accompanied by feelings of shame and regret”.  “OMW” 🙁 this does not sound like a healthy mind-set for someone trying to parent children.

The big question is, why are we feeling so much guilt and are we passing the “Guilt Gene” onto our children? I sincerely hope not because the last thing I want is my children growing up, with such a negative outlook.

If I think back to my early days of motherhood, I can remember feeling completely overwhelmed by the responsibility I had for this young life – if you let it, this can turn into feelings of guilt, inadequacy and even depression. We might not realise it but we may harbour feelings of regret or guilt from our own childhood and this can often manifest, in a damaging way in our own parenting.

Just the other day my 8-year-old was questioning why I had not completed filling in her baby journal and yes this is true (*Blush*) but I decided that instead of feeling guilty about it I would suggest that we complete it together! The result – making the experience a positive and bonding one, instead of me feeling wracked with guilt and explaining that I am not perfect . {And honestly have just not had the time.}

So what can we do to stop this pattern from occurring in our lives? I think, essentially we need to say NO to guilt! This brings me back to an article I read many years ago. I cannot tell you who wrote it but the essence is: you need to practice “good enough parenting”. This sounds like such an easy concept but think about it – you actually need to learn how to say “no”. That means not over committing yourself – which can be hard for many of us to do, especially moms. Stop being a people pleaser – ask me, I know I am one; stop trying to be everything to everybody! This includes your children. I need to remind myself, that I do not always have to give in to everything they want and I need to say no sometimes and yes – not feel guilty about it.

Another very important part of not allowing guilt to rule your life is not being afraid to fail because if we let our fear of not being a good parent or making mistakes take over, we can never be who we were truly intended to be as people or parents! So it really comes down to “the good, the bad and the ugly” no holds barred Guilt Free Parenting.

This clearly is something I know I need to work on – so let’s say it together “I will banish the guilt!” Stop trying so hard and being so hard on yourself -stop the blame game – let it go and just be free from it!

A few books on the topic which could be helpful to read:
  • “Guilt-Free Motherhood: Parenting with Godly Wisdom”- by Julianna Slattery
  • “Mommy Guilt: Learn to Worry Less, Focus on What Matters Most, & Raise Happier Kids”- by Julie Bort, Aviva Pflock and Devra Renner MSW
  • “The Balanced Mom: Raising Your Kids Without Losing Yourself”- by Bria Simpson
  • “Motherhood Without Guilt: Being The Best Mother You Can Be and Feeling Great About It”-by Debra Rosenberg

*Please note: This is an update of a previous post.*

 

Children, Family, Parenting

Top 5 New Baby Essentials

 

Having a baby is a truly life-changing experience. It’s a brilliant time, full of expectancy and excitement. But it can also be a time of nerves and anxiety. Luckily, there are plenty of places you can go to get advice. Ask your family, your doctor or a health visitor, and speak to other mums – you’ll soon realise that everything is going to be fine.

Before the baby arrives, it’s a good idea to make sure that everything is in order and that you have everything you need. You’re not going to have much free time once your baby is born, so get prepared now. There are five essential items that every baby will need to thrive in the first few important months of life.

Top 5 New Baby Essentials:

1. Car seat
There’s no avoiding it – if you’ve got a car, you need a seat to keep your precious baby safe. They’re readily available, but always buy new. It’s just safer that way.

2. Baby bottles
Even if you’re going to breastfeed, you still need bottles to deliver expressed milk. You’re going to need a range of sizes because before long, your little one will be drinking more than a small bottle can hold. As well as bottles, you’re also going to need baby grows and plenty of nappies. These are the main necessities for any new-born baby, so think about stocking up now.

3. Stroller
After a few months your baby is going to start to want to move and explore. A stroller is basically a mobile support frame that allows your baby to get around before they can do so completely unsupported. You can pick up strollers – also known as baby walkers – without spending a fortune.

4. Baby bouncer
Before they get mobile, you’re going to need somewhere stimulating to put the baby when you aren’t holding him or her. Baby bouncers are safe and fun ways for babies to take in their environment, while allowing you to get on with the many things you need to be doing. You’re going to be busy, so this is a valuable item to have.

5. Crib/cot
Although it might not seem like your baby is ever going to sleep, you need a comfortable and warm cot for them to rest in. This is a really important place for a baby, and if it’s somewhere that they feel comfortable, you may even be able to get a couple of hours sleep yourself! Always buy a respectable brand name.

Images: Pinterest & ©FAR Photography

Disclaimer: This is a sponsored post

Children, Education, Family, Lifestyle, Parenting, Parenting Advice, Websites

How safe is the internet for our children?

How Safe is the Internet

As a parent you would certainly not allow your child to hop on a train or bus unaccompanied and travel into unknown territory where they could encounter unsavoury characters and be exposed to potentially harmful situations. Then it may also be safe to assume that you would not allow your child to roam cyber space unsupervised? We cannot deny that computers and the internet have become part of our everyday lives but in the same breath we as parents need to be responsible for our children’s exposure to this technological world.

 

As a family we are quite computer or tech orientated but as with the monitoring of TV, it is our responsibility to ensure that our children are protected and aware of the potential dangers of exposing themselves to the digital world out there. I think that firstly you need to monitor the amount of time children spend on the computer and the internet, give them set parameters to adhere to and set consequences if these are not met. It is also important to encourage children to spend time outdoors, not just focused on a screen for hours on end! Most importantly, as with television, make sure that you have parental control software installed, on your home or child’s computer. Installing software like K9 Web Protection is essential and the best way to ensure your children are safe from potential online predators or exposure to unsuitable web content.

 

I feel that it is important to implement these measures early on, as soon as your children are computer literate. You will be amazed at how tech savvy children are, even from preschool age and just how easy it is to innocently stumble upon unsavoury content. In my mind the best policy is not to take any chances, install the necessary software and educate your children about the internet, as soon as they are old enough to understand. Making them aware of the fact that it is not safe to give out their personal details over the web.

According to stats from K9 Web Protection, one in four children have unwanted exposure to inappropriate pictures each year and nine of ten children aged 8-16 have viewed pornography on the Internet, often in the process of doing homework.

I also feel that exposure to Social networking sites, like Twitter and Facebook should be held off for as long as possible, young children are not mature enough to understand the potential threats that they may be exposed to by using these sites.

So most importantly, we as parents, need to beware of what our children are doing when it comes to internet and computer usage and keep the line of communication open at all times, so that they will feel free to ask questions at any time.

Source:©FAR Photography

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